Even the Best Recipes Fail Sometimes...

Jan here, hanging my head in shame. This perfect recipe was a failure, and it was all my fault.

It all started last fall when my soon-to-be daughter-in-law...

Less than four weeks until the wedding!

...moved into the apartment the happy couple will be sharing after the wedding next month.

Around here, when someone moves it's all hands on deck! My dear friend, Vonda, wasn't able to help that day, but she made this to-die-for coffee cake for the workers.

It was fabulous, so (of course) I asked for the recipe. Would you believe she got it from the Pioneer Woman website? Of course she did. All of those recipes are fabulous. :)

(By the way, the link takes you to the Pioneer Woman's home page. I did that on purpose so you can browse if you've never been there before. If you want to go straight to the non-fail version of the Best Coffee Cake. Ever., follow this link: recipe)

So fast forward to last Wednesday. The day of errors.

First of all, the weather was bad and getting worse. Cold to the bone and getting colder, spits of snow, ice on the roads...and our Bible study group was supposed to meet at our home.

Which meant I got to bake a dessert! Woo-hoo! I had been waiting for an excuse to try this recipe!

So let's take a break from the sad story, and I'll give you the recipe:

The Best Coffee Cake. Ever. 
from the Pioneer Woman website, adjusted a bit by Jan

ingredients for the cake:
3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) butter, softened
2 cups sugar
3 cups flour
4 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 1/4 cups whole milk
3 egg whites, beaten until stiff

(Topping ingredients are below.)

So there's the cake. Easy, right?

I measured my dry ingredients into a mixing bowl (not the one that comes with your mixer.)

I separated my eggs. Sadly, this is a permanent separation. The egg yolks were added to the dog's food for a yummy, nutritious treat.

My butter was softened and waiting in my mixing bowl. I added the 2 cups of sugar and beat them together until they were fluffy.

Okay. So far so good.

Because this is a cake, the next step is to beat the flour mixture and the milk into the butter/sugar mixture, alternating about 1/3 of each and beating after each addition.

But I had forgotten to check the milk. The fridge was empty. It was gone.  Someone (Benjamin) had taken the last of it with him to work that morning.

So I figured I would substitute. After all, my pantry is well stocked, right?

It wasn't until later - much later - that I remembered that you should dilute evaporated milk according to the directions on the can. I put it in as-is.

Remember, as I'm making this I'm expecting company in a few hours, and I still have to vacuum the living room!

The next thing was to fold in the egg whites. But, alas, I hadn't beaten them to form stiff peaks yet! So the rest of the batter (with the baking powder doing what baking powder does) sat in the mixing bowl while I got out my trusty rotary beater and beat the egg whites.

You may read a magazine while you wait.

FINALLY, I was able to fold in those egg whites.

Except that I missed a little phrase in the Pioneer Woman's recipe: "The batter will seem a little stiff when you start folding, but before long the consistency will be just perfect." I stopped folding too soon.

Let's soldier on.

In the Pioneer Woman's recipe, she says you should bake this in a cake pan with high sides...or something like that. So I quickly got out my new 10.5"x15" baking dish and greased it up. I spread my too-stiff batter on the bottom and turned to the next step in the recipe.

The Topping

ingredients:
3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) butter, softened
3/4 cups flour
1 1/2 cups brown sugar
2 Tablespoons cinnamon
1 1/2 cups pecans, chopped

Sounds like heaven, right?

Except that during my Christmas baking spree(s), I happened to use up all of the brown sugar.

No problem, right? I know that I can substitute 1 cup of white sugar mixed with 1 Tablespoon molasses for the brown sugar.

Oh, and I had pecans in the pantry! (Not remembering that they were from Christmas 2015, not 2016.)

Sigh. Can I blame the coming storm? The dark wintry skies? The fact that my mind was on my next Work in Progress, trying to figure out a wrinkle in the plot line?

The topping looked good when I got it all mixed up.

I spread it on top of the cake batter and stuck it in the oven. 40-45 minutes @ 350°.

I vacuumed, dusted and decluttered for 45 minutes, then checked the cake. It smelled delicious! And the batter was no longer jiggly in the pan.

Out of the oven, it looked wonderful. It needed to cool for a while, so I went on with my preparations - a quick going-over of the bathroom was next.

Meanwhile, middle son Benjamin came home from work with the announcement: "It's really slick out there."

I looked out at the falling snow, and called an audible. I conferred with my husband (still putting in a full-day's work), and we decided to cancel our Bible study. I made the necessary phone calls, then went back to the cake.

I had told Benjamin he could try it.

It didn't look anything like Vonda's cake had looked back in October. And didn't look anything like the Pioneer Woman's cake.

And then there was the underlying odor of...what could that be? Oh. Rancid pecans. No wonder Benjamin scraped them off. :(

We had soup for supper, and I spent the evening cross-stitching. And trying to forget the coffee cake fail sitting on the kitchen counter.

But now that a few days have gone by, I think I know where I failed.

1) I didn't make sure I had all the ingredients ahead of time, because I knew I had them...but I was wrong.

2) I should have used a 9"x13" pan. That's the size Vonda had used, and I knew it would work.

3) I didn't use the evaporated milk correctly, which made the cake batter stiff. Way too stiff.

4) I should have tasted - or at least smelled - the pecans before adding them to the cake.

5) I was in too much of a hurry. I didn't read the recipe completely before starting it, and when I ran into the first snag, I didn't have time to regroup and do something else.

So please try this recipe - it really is wonderful - just don't do it the way I did!

Okay, time to 'fess up - what was your last recipe fail???

Jan Drexler loves her family, her home, cooking and just about anything made by hand. But she loves her Lord most of all.

Stop by Jan's website to learn more about her books: www.JanDrexler.com

Pioneer Woman Cooks Sparkle Cake in Raspberry and Peach

Hello, everybody! The Fresh Pioneer is back and I know you're thinking, "wait, weren't you just here??"
  I was! Thanks for noticing! Now, my last post I mentioned Pioneer Woman Cooks had put up some recipes for Easter/ after Easter and I was determined to make her Sparkle Cake even thought it might end up a "fail". I won't post this picture again because I don't want any comparisons (haha!) but here's the Sparkle Cake Recipe.

(This is her ham. My didn't look like this but it was still soooooo gooooood.) 

 In her recipe she actually makes the angel food cake and although it did look VERY EASY, I was really pressed for time. not that I have such a busy life, but as usual, I'd left my YBC post until the very last day! (WHY DO I DO THAT?) So, Tuesday afternoon at 4PM, I realize that I should take some shortcuts. So, I bought my angel food cake and the rest is just as the recipe reads, except I also decided to change the flavor.

 In the original, she uses strawberry, but I LOVE raspberry and my husband loves mango. Since we were having guests, I thought, "Let's make two!"
(What's better than one Sparkle Cake? Duh, TWO Sparkle Cakes!)
You're going to need an angel food cake, a packet of jello, and some frozen fruit. Also, heavy cream for the topping.

 So, let's start with our angel food cake. *MMMMMMMM*

 Flip it upside down (fat side down) and gently saw off the top about three inches from the bottom.
                                     
Yes, I KNOW it's crooked. So sue me.
                                 
Now, gently insert the knife about a half inch from the outer edge and cut all the way around, not reaching the bottom. A few pokes won't hurt, but try not to saw all the way through to the foil or you won't have anything for the filling to rest on when you spoon it inside.
                                       
Again, gently saw through the cake about a 1/2 inch from the inside edge. Now you have to concentric circles. Start to peel out the inner cake. I was afraid it would all come out in a big blob, leaving me with chunks of cake, but it wasn't too hard. I pulled at it from the bottom, near the lower layer so I could control how much came out.
                                      
OK, so our cakes have a neat little trench to be filled!

 Take the fruit from the freezer, so they're at the ready.

 But one cup of boiling water into a bowl.
 This is a fascinating picture, no? I could stare at it all day.)

 Add the package of raspberry (or whatever flavor you desire) jello and stir until dissolved. (In my picture, I have a larger package, so I just used half. If you buy a small package, use the entire thing.)

 And the mango is started...

 As soon as the raspberry Jello is dissolved, stir in the raspberries. This is like adding the cold water. Instantly, the Jello should start to set.

 Same thing with the peaches. Oh, you're wondering why it's not frozen mango? Well, apparently there was a run on frozen mangoes in our grocery store today. It's a conspiracy, I'm sure of it! They must have known I was going to try something with frozen mangoes!
 (Uhhhhh, I swear that is spelled MANGOS but it keeps blinking at me... so I'll put in the 'e'. But I'm fairly certain that's not right. )
  Anyway, I grabbed some frozen peaches. Everybody loves peaches... right?

 Just in case you think I forgot, here's the other angel food cake.

 In about five minutes, the Jello is set!

 Here's the raspberry.

 Spoon the mixture into the middle of the angel food cake.

 Replace the top.

Same with the peach-mango. 

 Now, whipping cream! Whip into stiff peeks.

 I had this idea of tinting it blue and making it sort of Fourth of July-looking, but my kids said it was too early. (But take note, this would be a great cake for the 4th!) Anyway, I tinted it pink.

 Whipped topping covers a multitude of sins, as the picture shows. It was soooo pretty! (The afternoon sun was coming in and making it hard to take the picture, but maybe you can still see...)

 The pink was light and delicate. This is probably the prettiest cake I've ever made.

                                                                     NOM NOM NOM.

 I was fully prepared for the cake to fall apart as it was cut, but it arrived on the plate basically in one piece.

 The inside was very flavorful, since it really only had half the water it needed for the Jello recipe.

 And I was also prepared for the entire cake to collapse after I cut the first slice. Not too bad...

 And here's the peach-mango cake. We tinted it a very light yellow but you probably can't tell.

 I thought of filling the hole with foil and making the center a place to set a fancy fruit design, but our guests were almost here so, I just plopped on the peaches.

Close up! This was definitely my favorite of the two. Really fun flavor and different from chocolate/vanilla/strawberry...

I also wanted to share our first try at Jan's smoothie recipe. It was SO DELICIOUS! And yes, I had to make this much just so everyone could have a small glass. But it was so healthy and good for the family, I'm more than willing to put in the quality time with my old blender.

I had to get a picture of this fine smoothie 'stache. He had no idea what we were laughing at, but he very sweetly waited until I could snap a photo!

  I'll leave you with one more fun picture....

It's my third Austen Takes the South book, already up on Amazon for pre-order! I was checking something else and the title popped up... I thought, "What? I just turned that girl in!" But there she was, sweet and sassy. It's sort of a bare bones place-holder, but it does have the blurb in case anyone wants to take a peek.

 All right, my friends! Have a wonderful week and I wish you the very best Spring weather!

Easter Recipe BONANZA!

Hello, everybody! The Fresh Pioneer is back and this is a multi-purpose post. Good Friday, Holy Saturday, and EASTER SUNDAY! We've made it! HALLELUJAH!
                                                             But first... rewind....

 

 I hope everyone has had a wonderful Good Friday. We usually attend a Good Friday service at our church where we venerate the cross, meaning everyone comes up and usually bows or kneels at the foot of the cross. It's very solemn and serious. But this year we were invited by our friend Barbara to a retirement center. She wanted to have an Easter concert sing-a-long. Hey, we love to be invited anywhere, so we said "sure".
   Then we had to practice. Most of the songs she chose were hymns we'd never heard before. The youtube clips she sent for us to listen to (and practice with) included Tennessee Ernie Ford and Alan Jackson and Johnny Cash. My kids had NO IDEA who these people were. It was a great education in musical history and gospel hymns!

                                  (Is it just me, or is this a hilarious little statue to have in a nursing home?)

 Anyway, we learned a lot of new songs, sang a few from our tradition (like Lord of All Hopefulness). It was great fun and there was a big turn out. Of course, these older folks already knew the hymns, so we hardly needed to lead. Which was good because the little guys were busy looking at the fish tanks and rolling around on the ground. They were there for entertainment value, definitely. At the end we passed out Easter goodies, in tiny pastel boxes. My husband folded them, the girls and I filled them with confetti, and the boys added the candies. Hm, I wonder where there were hardly any leftover candies??

Something I love about the Easter season is finding new ways to share the Easter story with kids. The sacrifice of the cross is not a warm and fuzzy story, but it's powerful. But how to introduce small kids to it in a way that really helps them remember the sacrifice and God's love for them?

 Food, of course! We all love food, and we usually remember a good dish long after a puppet show has faded from our memory. My friend Christalee sent me this link to Resurrection Rolls.

 You take a package of refrigerated crescent dough, roll a marshmallow in melted butter, then in sugar and cinnamon. (The sugar and cinnamon are supposed to symbolize the spices the women were bringing to put on Jesus' body.) You roll up the dough, explaining how they rolled a big heavy stone in front and there were soldiers guarding it. And when the rolls are done, you crack them open, and show them... Ta-DAH! The tomb is empty!

I was wondering a little about the marshmallow melting all over (can you tell I have a very literal child who would wonder why Jesus melted??) and then I realized we could talk about how they only found his linen shroud.
 I also want to make them with PEEPS. (photo above)

The next thing I saw was this awesomely cool Easter egg made out of yarn and a balloon. "Heyyyy, I have yarn and a balloon," I thought. 

I was egged on (haha) by my facebook friends.

 (I am sure they only wanted to see the "nailed it" result but I decided to try it.)

Wellllll, here it is. One bottle of Mod Podge, a skein of pink yarn, and the ruin of one giant green balloon later. It wasn't strong enough to sit upright on a pretty cake platter, so it's resting in a plastic bowl. I already have the giant Easter bunny to go in it bu THE KIDS DO NOT KNOW THIS. They think it might appear there, on Easter Sunday. Or maybe some eggs. They're not quite sure what is going to be in there when they wake up on Sunday morning.

 We'll dye eggs tomorrow and the kids always have a great time... but then we have a bazillion boiled eggs that no one wants to eat. Here's another great recipe for colored deviled eggs. How cute are these?? I'm thinking I'd like a tray of just teal and pink. Or maybe just light green and teal.

 The site's directions are very simple. Basically, proceed as if you're making a normal batch of deviled eggs, but use the leftover dye. (What? you threw it out? Oh, wait... you didn't because you haven't dyed your eggs yet, like me.)

Now you're probably wondering where all the REAL food is, right? (Or not, since we're now the blog that is run completely by people trying NOT TO EAT.) Well, Pioneer Woman Cooks (REEEEEE!!!! I love you!!!!) put up a link to all her Easter recipes EVAH.

You need a ham recipe?

 Here's her glazed Easter ham.

How about the most delicious fruit salad on the planet? I've made this without the vanilla bean and it was just as good!

Or this strawberry sparkle cake! This is what i'm making for my post this next Tuesday. Don't expect it to look anything like this, so feel free to immediately forget this photo. Enjoy it now, but come Tuesday, no LAUGHING when my version is somewhat less beautiful. 

I'll leave you with this steampunk egg by Thierry Atlan, the great chocolatier. Forty pounds, five thousand dollars. Who wants to buy this for my Easter basket??

Have a wonderful Easter everyone! May the joy and blessing of the resurrection touch each and every one of you. As we say in our Easter service, "He is risen! Indeed, He is risen!"